I wrote this essay about 1 1/2 yrs ago; I'm happy to say, Daniel is now 16 1/2, and he and Lindsey are still an item. Where the future takes them, only God knows, but I'm enjoying the ride.
I have a lovesick teenager at my house. He’s fifteen years old, smitten by a fifteen year old female. My son Daniel has been dating Lindsey for about nine months now, and although their relationship is innocent enough, I have to say his behavior is completely silly. This is the boy who, five short years ago, was the president of the Anti-Girls Club, an organization made up of 5 prepubescent wannabe men; who vowed to never like a girl, let alone touch one, and never, ever marry one. What is it about love, even puppy love that absolutely changes rational human beings into starry eyed saps?
I remember being a boy-crazy little girl who followed young males around the playground, watching their every move, daydreaming that they would turn and smile, and ask me to join them in their game of basketball. Even when they flipped my skirt up, pulled my hair, or tried to see up my dress when I was on the swings, I still believed that someday one of these handsome boys would pick me up, put me on his white horse, and ride off into the sunset to live in a castle, happily ever after.
I don’t think that much changes as we get older. Look at all the promises of advertising, which guarantee you’ll snag that special someone, simply by drinking the right diet soda, or driving the right car. And we fall for it, male and female alike. We believe that love is something that can be bought and sold. Women go to great lengths to change how they look, smell, and feel, all in the hopes of eternal bliss.
This is not a new thing; examples date back to the beginning of time. Eve gave Adam the apple, in hopes that she could lure him with wisdom. David went to great lengths to kill Bathsheba’s husband, in order to cover up his affair and win her as the prize. King Solomon, supposedly the wisest man to ever live, wrote one of the most steamy, syrupy love stories to the Queen of Sheba, and it actually worked.
Wars have been fought over love, kingdoms joined and toppled, murders committed. Sometimes the negative effects of love are easier to see than the positive ones. But they are there, and it’s actually in the ridiculousness of love that you find its beauty. Is it rational to love someone who has betrayed you with another? Is it sane to give everything you have for the object of your desire? Does it make sense to drive all night, sleep deprived, for one more moment with your love before they ship out? No it doesn’t. And that’s why we crave it. The idea that someone would be so crazy in love with us that they would do the most unpractical things is mesmerizing.
My son came home last week with what looks to me like a wedding ring on his left hand. I choked back my hysteria to ask him what this was. He replied “a promise ring.” To which I said “ a promise to what”? He said “marry her”. Let me repeat; this is my fifteen year old. How irrational is that?
But then I look at my right hand, where there is a ring of silver on the finger. It was given to me when I was fifteen, a promise to always love me and cherish me, and to be together forever, to be made official at a later date. And twenty four years later, that rash promise has been kept. Who knows? Love is rarely predictable; it’s a gamble.
Some win, some lose, and most fall completely overboard, but it’s always worth the chance.
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